The Anger Habit

The ‘anger habit’ includes the tendency to experience temper tantrums, feelings of on-going frustration, resentment, irritability, etc.

We call it a habit because it is a habitual way of behaving and responding to circumstances of which we disapprove. It is not ‘how I am’ – it is ‘how I react’.

The habit of feeling angry a lot of the time can control your life. It can damage your health, ruin peace of mind, spoil your relationships, jeopardise your career – and even cost you your liberty if, for example, a violent temper or a furious outburst results in a prison sentence.

(Dates for the next Short Fuse Workshop in Bournemouth will be announced early Spring 2017. Use our main contact form to get word immediately dates are finalised.)

Just what is anger?

Anger is a feeling which some of us experience when events in our world are not going according to our plans. Usually we have an idea of how things, events and people should be – and when they don’t march to our tune we get angry and either feel frustrated and simmer or we try to change the events or people.

This approach works fine, up to a point, until we are about four or five years old. After this it becomes less effective: the rest of the world gradually stops indulging us as we grow up.

But that doesn’t stop many of us remaining a victim to our tempers all of our lives.

So, in essence, anger is the feeling we get when we feel driven to control the world about us. It’s a pretty childish emotion – since no one person can or will ever be able to control everyone else in the world – or even in one’s own family.

We know that. But usually don’t know what to about it – so we carry on trying!